Saturday, November 14, 2015

Dusting Off the Old Abby Update- Makes it real

Writing helps me think and process.  While we were in the Japanese hospital, St. Luke's in Tokyo, I wrote this while waiting to get the bone marrow procedure and test.

November 12th-

Well, I guess we'll have done this twice now.  Wow.

When you walk into a room with 4 doctors that is never good. That's what I just did.  There are some things that transcend the language barrier huh?!  Lots of doctors in a room after a longer-than-normal wait time is one of those things.

I will remember this day for the rest of my life, just like the time that Dr. Samuelson told me the first time that Abby had Cancer.  I remember that vividly too.  I'll remember this in the same way.  I will remember walking out to the little garden area, calling Tiffany and telling her that, “we need to talk.”  But this time it is in Japan, on my Japanese phone, I took a crowded rush hour train here not a car.  How will we do this cancer thing here?  Oh, how your life can change with 1 train ride. Yet, at least this time I know the potential road ahead.  Blood cell counts are abnormal, but you shouldn’t have 12.5 % Blast cells in your blood, you should have 0.  12.5- I will now have another number burned into my brain.  Last time it was 70,000 total white count, this time it’s 12.5.  -oh how numbers can have such significance.


But 50%.  It could just be a scare.  I used to have the mug that said, “reaching for 50%”, I wish I had that now.  It would be good to carry around. 

That's all I got to write that day.  The rest is a blur.  Leukemia in Japan.  The taxi ride home was worth the full cost.  We sat in the quiet and I thought about how my life was once again going to change.  I don't know what Abby thought about she is often pretty quiet.  She is a strong kiddo but I don't want her to have to be so strong