I remember this life. You can't sleep so you start to think. And thinking turns into the need to write and so you start to type. They you figure that you shouldn't keep these thoughts to yourself so... you post. It's kind of being in a coffee shop. Nice windows, free coffee, comfy chairs that turn into beds, clean sterile floors, lots of fun bells ringing. Well, I guess the coffee and chairs are the same. I wonder if they would let spruce it up a bit more. Maybe let me bring a laser cutter in here? -I could cut our a really cool room sign for everyone!
Anyway, Abby is finally asleep. It has been a rough re-entry. I think she just has so many fears that get brought up from her past experiences, fears that she doesn't even know are in there. Today her main emotion was fear and anxiety over what will be the next painful procedure. Jet lag doesn't help either. I'm wide awake at 10pm and I don't have an IV in me. They moved her IV yesterday and put it in her other arm but still she says it hurts. Her back was also sore but that seems better now with tylenol. Basically she has been in some sort of pain for the last 5 or 6 weeks since her legs first started being bruised and swollen. Chronic pain just wears you down, I hope she can get some sort of relief soon.
They did the bone marrow test today and got the preliminary results in a format that they can read, in English this time too, which also helps with the readability. Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (ALL). We will know what type it is tomorrow but the Japanese tests already showed that it was pre-b, the same type she had last time. She will also go into surgery for 2 procedures: a spinal tap + chemo, and she will also get her med-o-port which allows them to access her veins without having to give her an IV.
It's weird to be here again, last time I wrote about her first treatment I was wrought with fear but this time I'm not. I just want her to get going so that she will start to understand that fear has no power over her. My prayer is, that her fears of the unknown will be replaced by a kind of peace that can't be taken away by these new circumstances in her life.
Have a good night, or day... depending where you happen to be in the world.